simplypurkey:

jazzumon:

destielkills:

auntiesnixshipper:

awkwardteenagenerves:

discard-and-discover:

evolve-within:

disregardwomen:

When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees.

Jesus I envy that relationship. 

this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”. 

My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me.

i love all of your moms

When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad.


That last story is worth reblogging

simplypurkey:

jazzumon:

destielkills:

auntiesnixshipper:

awkwardteenagenerves:

discard-and-discover:

evolve-within:

disregardwomen:

When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees.

Jesus I envy that relationship. 

this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”. 

My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me.

i love all of your moms

When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad.

That last story is worth reblogging

(via unit-26)


Omg

Omg


hokaegu:

dorkvader:

neon-casket:

this cat is chubby halloween

THIS CAT HAS THE EYES OF SAURON

i looked into the abyss and the abyss looked back

(via horrorchampharvey)


sexhaver:

sexhaver:

(via unit-26)



ruinedchildhood:

Remember when Stitch took Aladdin’s girl?

(via unit-26)


(via kevinodea)


(via unit-26)


coderedillniggaalert:

lol this lil white girl is tru as shit

no crying no whining no tears she was ready to pop off

(via nekomimimisa)


So let me tell you a fun little story. 
I am so in love with giraffes they are my all time favourite animal. I love their big dumb bodies and their crazy tongue situation. So over the weekend my boyfriend and I decided to make an adventure to the zoo. Now I have never been to the calgary zoo, I was so excited and I had literally just watched the tigers for half an hour before this had happened. I also have never in my life seen a live in the flesh giraffe. So the minute I walked into the giraffe area. My heart started pounding. I was so fucking excited about seeing these animals that I went into a panic attack. When I got closer to the giraffes I had to fight off tears. I literally went “kristen bell with the sloth ” at the zoo. So forever I will be reminded about the time I had a panic attack at the Zoe because of a couple of giraffes.

So let me tell you a fun little story.
I am so in love with giraffes they are my all time favourite animal. I love their big dumb bodies and their crazy tongue situation. So over the weekend my boyfriend and I decided to make an adventure to the zoo. Now I have never been to the calgary zoo, I was so excited and I had literally just watched the tigers for half an hour before this had happened. I also have never in my life seen a live in the flesh giraffe. So the minute I walked into the giraffe area. My heart started pounding. I was so fucking excited about seeing these animals that I went into a panic attack. When I got closer to the giraffes I had to fight off tears. I literally went “kristen bell with the sloth ” at the zoo. So forever I will be reminded about the time I had a panic attack at the Zoe because of a couple of giraffes.